7 Coaches Reveal Self-Care Rituals They Swear By
Updated: Oct 20, 2022
In our highly connected and constantly "on" world, stories of occupational burnout are becoming the new normal.
With the all-pervasive hustle and grind culture, most people are living neck-up, ignoring their own needs until things fall apart.
As a self-employed copywriter, I spend most of my days reading and writing (read: glued to a screen).
When I work, I disappear into my headspace, forgetting to connect to my body and to give it the nourishment she craves.
Feeling completely exhausted every afternoon after only 5-6 hours of online work, I knew that something needed to change.
I couldn’t continue feeling like a mashed potato every day past 2 pm.
So I asked some of my friends and clients–all coaches passionate about self-care–,
What do you do to recharge your batteries on a day-to-day basis, so you can avoid burnout and enjoy your business and life?
Here’s what they told me…
Claudia Wildera, Health Coach
For Claudia, self-care is at the core of her business and life. As a highly sensitive entrepreneur, moving her body through dance, dynamic meditation, and daily workouts is key to feeling good.
It helps her drop out of her mind, get in touch with her emotions, and, as a result, live in a state of grace.
“Without the presence of grace, I lose my why and my inspiration,” she says. "Being in grace means flowing and being fully immersed in what I'm doing in every moment."
She also finds that working for a maximum of 90 minutes at a time helps her from dissociating from her body. When she focuses on one task for 3-6 hours straight, it kills her.
So she shakes things up by changing her environment. A dance break, a quick walk outside, or a visit to the local Spa all work well.
She even showed me a video on her Instagram of her taking ice baths outside her apartment building every morning!
Sarrah Rose, Sex Coach
After getting burned out last year, Sarrah radically simplified her business. She pruned all her income streams until she had only ONE product left. This radical focus freed up time for self-care.
“Moving my body allows my brain to move,” Sarrah told me.
Embodiment practices she swears by include working out in the mornings, listening to guided hypnosis, and self-pleasuring.
At the end of each day, she also takes a salt bath to clear her energy.
Pleasure is a big source of nourishment for Sarrah.
“Pleasure is everywhere–we just need to create space for it. Don’t shut it down when you feel it; expand it.”
Running her nails over her knees, rubbing her foot, or running her fingers through her hair… these are all tiny actions she does to feel pleasure. Sarrah has literally trained herself to feel pleasure in every moment.
Beautiful sights and smells, like the scent of a candle or body lotion, bring her pleasure, too. It’s all about being fully present to receive the sensations and letting them nourish you.
Lore Blanke, Embodiment Coach
As an Embodiment Coach, Lore lives the power of pleasure. She finds that daily self-pleasuring lights her up from within.
Her creativity and inspiration are highly connected to her sex life.
When she’s had a night of delicious explorations with her lover, she gets intense downloads the next morning, filling countless pages in her journal with ideas for new content.
And when Lore discovered cyclical living only three months into her new business, it changed everything. Now, she’s no longer trying to be the same every day.
Instead, she follows her menstrual cycle when working.
As a result, she’s happier, more creative, and deeply aligned with her body’s wisdom and guidance.
Alice Hong, Intimacy Coach
Alice is yet another pleasure expert. Like Sarrah, Alice knows that boundless pleasure is already here; we only need to receive it to let it nourish us.
One simple pleasure practice she shared with me is moving with the sunlight.
When she’s working in front of her computer, she sits in a place where sunlight streams in through the window. When the sun shifts position, so does Alice.
Like me, Alice enjoys slow mornings. She never books any meetings before 10 am.
This sacred time is reserved for yoga and meditation, savoring hot chocolate on the balcony (her favorite drink), and allowing herself spaciousness to just be.
Alice also gets her best ideas after love-making or self-pleasuring. (Do you see a red thread here?)
“We can’t be creative when we’re tense. Relaxation in mind and body is vital for letting new ideas flow through.”
Yves Bonroy, Sex Coach
Yves recharges his batteries by working out (Hello embodiment!).
He told me that “two hours in the gym can be as productive as four hours in front of the computer.”
Walking on the treadmill, with full awareness of the sensations in his muscles, he reconnects to his body and thereby his inspiration.
Although he’s wearing his noise-canceling headphones, Yves is not listening to music.
This serves to avoid over-stimulating his nervous system from too much input.
Instead, he keeps a soft outward focus on his surroundings. This practice, inspired by author Sam Harris, helps him detach from his thoughts and emotions and land even deeper in his physical vessel.
Yves also allows himself to slow down when needed, going for long walks in nature or simply resting at home.
“When I’m agitated and overwhelmed, I just hold myself in a fetal position,” he explains.
This type of self-soothing is so simple yet very powerful.
It regulates our nervous system, makes us feel safe, and thereby prevents us from spiraling further down into burnout.
Aleah Ava, Relationship Coach
Aleah prioritizes hot baths and getting generous amounts of sleep to recover.
Sometimes, she even binge-watches Netflix and eats chocolate. But instead of feeling guilty about the indulgence, she allows herself to enjoy such simple pleasures.
She told me that “letting go of everything can completely change your emotional state.
But when you’re following your body’s impulse to rest, you can get that same task done in 2 hours once you’ve rested.”
Aleah also taught me to honor myself and my needs more.
To try this, close your eyes and ask yourself: “What do I need right now?” The answer will emerge from within because our bodies are infinitely wise.
When you got the guidance, follow it to the best of your abilities. Don’t let your mind talk you out your inner knowing.
Aleah also tries to not bring work into her private life.
To do this, sometimes she just needs to vent for a few minutes. She asks her partner (or a friend) for "permission to vomit."
While they hold space, she expresses all her fears or frustrations until it’s out of her system, so she can be fully present with her loved ones.
Sabina Elsa Astolfi, Voice Coach
Singing and chanting sacred mantras is Sabina’s greatest source of pleasure and nourishment.
She told me that “singing regulates our nervous system by decreasing stress. It also improves our mood and strengthens our immune systems.”
When I felt particularly exhausted at the end of last year, Sabina gifted me a virtual mantra workshop, where she taught me the Buddhist mantra
Nam Myoho Renge Kyo. After we chanted together for 10 minutes, I felt rejuvenated.
She’s been chanting this mantra for decades, and just like it helped Tina Turner transform her life and career, it did the same for Sabina.
Singing sacred mantras can help increase our focus, reduce fatigue and anxiety, and improve our mood and well-being.
A study from 2012 found notable improvements in mood, anxiety, tension, and fatigue in participants. They only meditated for 12 minutes a day for 8 consecutive weeks, but the results were "significant."
Here’s what I took with me…
Being surrounded by (and working with) such inspiring humans feels like a huge privilege. I’m deeply grateful for having all these wonderful people in my life.
As a result of our conversations, I’ve become more compassionate with myself.
The inner German drill sergeant’s voice is weakening.
I feel less guilty when my highly sensitive nervous system is telling me to step away from my computer to rest. I follow the guidance.
Making that time count, I stay focused with minimal distractions.
I also try to take 5-minute breaks every hour, stepping away from the screen and reconnecting to my body through breath, sound, and movement.
Finally, I make my afternoons a source of pleasure and nourishment.
If my brain is like mashed potatoes after 2 pm anyway, why push it?
Instead, I now take the afternoons off to go to the gym, take a walk, or call a friend.
I also plan on taking baths, dancing, or just lying on the floor gazing at the ceiling.
According to Liz Gilbert, that’s when the best ideas can come to us, anyway.
Creativity is all about relaxation, remember?
So, how will YOU care for yourself today?
Which of the above tips do you want to incorporate into your life?
Try a few and see which ones work for you.
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