Book excerpt: Why Women Should Cry During Sex*
Updated: Oct 7
First off, a crying woman is a beautiful thing.
Crying releases deep emotions, washes the body clean of all pain and leaves her open to receive love and sexual bliss.
When she cries, she opens her heart, softens her body, and releases pain which may have been held in for years.
A lover who makes his woman cry should be proud of himself.
Her tears show him that she’s trusting him deeply enough to express her true feelings
Tears in a woman during sex seldom come from pain, sadness, or loss. They almost always come from the emotional release of sadness or loss, opening her to new feelings of connection, love, and playfulness.
Tears are a sign of the transformational process of lovemaking: they are birthing new, better emotions into the universe.
By fully allowing your body to relax and express your emotions, you’re moving with the energy of the cosmos, which is as much a part of your body as it is part of all that is surrounding you.
Through the act of making love (to herself or a partner), she's using her body as a way to transcend and transform that which needs to be healed into love and openness. She's not only healing her own pain but the pain of generations of women who have come before her.
This cleaning process is the true awakening of the Big She
She is part of mother nature, and in the same way as nature renews, replenishes, and rinses itself through the use of rain, so does she through the expression of her tears.
When the pain of old, stored emotions is released through the expression of tears, she feels free, open, held, and received by her partner (if he or she is standing in full presence all through her storm).
This is why men should never abandon or emotionally shame their partner’s expressions.
If tears appear when you’re on your own, you should lovingly accommodate your emotional expression, holding yourself with compassion and understanding for your need for release, welcoming the softness a good cry invites into your body.
Finding back to your softness opens you up to release tiredness, stress, and blockages which have been preventing you from feeling the connection to the Big She and your higher Self.
When the pain of old emotions is released, you’re likely to experience a flood of creativity bursting through you.
You’ll feel the life force of love running through your body, making you a powerful, happy, and content creator. The release of old, stored emotions, and the willingness to openly believe that a better reality is possible for you, is the key to your personal transformation.
If your emotional expressions are held back, you’ll build resistance towards opening fully in love, thus holding back your experience of the Big She.
Sometimes it may be difficult for you to express your sadness when your body is opening into love. There might be other emotions, such as anger or frustration, which need to be expressed before you’re ready for the tears of relief. In these cases, we recommend that you find ways to express your anger and resentment.
*In loving co-creation with Ingunn Tennbakk and Gabriel.